Taming the mind

The photo used for this article may be a bit funny, but let's be honest, do we have the same mental discipline as this cat?

The author took this photo about a year ago, and was astonished by the discipline of the cat, observing the chicken, but not making a single move towards it. Just sitting quietly, observing. Now we all know that this is not normally the situation. We have probably seen our own cats or the cats of others chasing birds, butterflies, and even sometimes dogs around the garden!

What we want to consider, is how disciplined our own minds are? Are we like the cats chasing, but mostly being left empty-pawed, or empty-handed? Or are we like this cat in the photo, observing with discipline? Let's discuss!

The mind can be full of beautiful illusions. It can be our best friend, and also our worst enemy. The specific aspect that we want to discuss in this article, is the aspect of overthinking.

Yes, probably all of us are culprits to this one, aren't we? At some point or another, we have all gone down the bottomless, endless holes of the mind. Really, it is endless. So is overthinking, and this is okay, we can explore the mind, it is really vast, unlimited. However, what we tend to do, is generate attachment towards the ideas that come up within the mind. We live ourselves so into these illusions, that we start to see them as real. This is where the worrying comes in, the stress.

We can notice this pattern when we observe closely. We get stolen from the present moment, from the here and now, as the mind goes deeper and deeper and deeper into a stressy scenario. We end up anxious, biting our nails, overeating, indulging in drinking, or whatever it is that we do. All of this, by simply feeding an illusion, a cloud of thoughts.

It happens so quickly! Just one small sound, smell, or thoughts that come up. We grab, and down the rabbit hole we go!

How overthinking steals from us

When we contemplate this aspect of overthinking, we realize that it is not beneficial to anyone. Not ourselves or those around us.

For ourselves, we react to our thoughts, we react with stress and anxiety, which has a direct impact on our mental and physical wellbeing. It makes us sick, really. Further, it steals us away from the precious present, the only true place and time that we shall ever experience. Here, now.

Imagine how we may be in the presence of loved ones, our husband or wife, our children, parents, or friends. Physically we may be there, but internally the mind is playing games, and our attention is caught up in these illusions, so caught up, that we are missing out on the precious opportunity we have to experience each other. 

Some of us may have been in someone's presence, and when we speak to them, we can see that they are not present, they pretend to listen, to nod, but we can completely see that they are caught up somewhere in the mind. When this happens, we tend to feel upset, disappointed, or neglected, because we have this expectation that someone should pay attention to us, just as we are paying attention to them. Now, we do the same thing to those around us, drifting off, trading the company of loved ones for an idea. Neglecting others, for clouds of energy.

We are granted this life, and the lives of those around us, for a limited time, being in this form for a limited time, but we tend to take this for granted. Instead of being attentive to those around us, we are caught in our minds, and we miss out on reality. Precious opportunities that we miss out on, and when they are gone, they are gone. We can never hear that laugh again, we can never look into those eyes again because we were distracted by the minds. It happens in an instant!

How do we stay in the present?

Saying that we want to remain in the present moment sounds great, but unfortunately, it is not as simple as that. The mind is a creature of habit, and the ego-mind likes to be entertained, it likes to feel alive, to feel real and solid, and therefore it is always grasping at something. Seriously, check up, the mind had been doing this for years!

So, we want to break this habit, but how? Through meditation. Through mindfulness. We meditate on being mindful, and we can start to be in the present moment for short moments. Maybe a few seconds at first. Even if we can just stay present for a few seconds, that is great! We can train the minds into new habits, being present, more disciplined, for longer and longer periods. With time, we shall realize that we can re-wire the mind completely!

What we want to make clear here, is that we do not just rest the mind in the idea of the present, in the thought of the present, no. That would just be another thing we are thinking of. Just rest the awareness in the present, not clinging or grasping to any mental object.

Further, we can meditate on the emptiness of the thoughts we tend to chase, the emptiness of the stress and anxiety they bring. Even when we are chasing thoughts of pleasure, thoughts of excitement like traveling, a job promotion, a new car, or some food - let's leave the thoughts, and wait for the actual experience. We know that thoughts can never be as precious as the actual experience. Thoughts are simply not that.. hmmm.. that charming. What can be better than experience itself?

To sum all of this up, we want to understand that yes, we can think, we can use the mind, as it is an incredible tool, but we want to use it skillfully, mindfully! The mind can be an excellent servant, but it is a terrible, terrible master.

So, which one are we? The master or the servant of the mind? We decide. 

Can we silently observe the mind, observe the thoughts, or are we grasping at everything that appears in the mind?